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My friend Claudia, says the most intellectual ghetto insightful funny shit.  Examples…

12/21/14:  “Dude.  Fucked Al this a.m. and we ended up talking so nasty.  I think this nigga wants anal & bondage more than me.  Wouldn’t let him cum until he said, “Mommy, can I please cum now?” He said it & that nigga was hard as steel.  Freak!”

12/9/14:  “If that’s going in my ass, I’m gonna WD-40 that mofo.”

12/15/14:  “Took pics of my asshole.  Don’t like it.”

12/23/14:  “You have a world renown genius curled up into the fetal position, dribbling semen out his dick with nothing but your finger.  I’m scared of YOU!  Goldfinger!!!  Teach me Bitch!”